Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Babies Are Alive?


I visited a baby this weekend. Our friends gave birth to an amazing little baby boy about a week ago. I found myself staring at this kid's fragility, it's just an amazing miracle to ponder. The kid was really cool, and I'm happy for the family.

But as far as babies go, I'm not sure if I can support them these days. It's just, well, there are so many damn humans on this planet. We're overpopulated. I know it's creepy how China enforces governmental birth control on their citizens, but I'm starting to think that they might be on to something.

I just read a short story by Brian Aldiss called Super-Toys Last All Summer Long. In the story, citizens are not allowed to have children at all. The overpopulation problem has pushed it to this. So they basically use robot children for their parental, emotional purposes. Aldiss had an idea that I liked though: a birth lottery. It said that only couples who officially applied with the government for pregnancy would be eligible to have children of their own flesh and blood. This kept the numbers down and controlled.

Today, this is all too relevant. Since there is an overpopulation problem, here's what I propose we do: suck all the guys dry. Once a boy hits puberty, he should be required to go to the doctor to receive a vasectomy. And this is how he will remain, unless he decides that he wants to have a family someday. But even then, he can't just have his vasectomy reversed. He will have to sign up for the lottery. There will be no favoritism, no arian shit. The poor and the rich will all be in the same lottery, all races and religions. And only if he is picked in the lottery, only then will he be able to have his vasectomy reversed. 

I look around today, and I'm just disgusted by how many people there are. Have you ever been on a highway? It's unbelievable! What are all of these people doing? Who are they?

Maybe someday I'll have a kid, maybe even two. But adoption makes more sense than ever these days. And in an age when we have the most advanced, effective birth control in history, we're still dropping them out like they're hot.

I understand that a lot of couples become pregnant accidentally, and I have to just shrug my shoulders about that. If a sperm was so determined to go all the way, even amidst rubbers and pull outs and morning after pills, there's probably some destiny going on. If it's an accident, fine. That makes enough sense. Dick goes in, dick goes out, dick goes in, PREMATURE SPLOOGE! AH!, pregnant. Yeah, that's just nature. But what I wonder about is the couple "trying" to have a baby. "Trying" to have a baby? For real? Come on people, there's an overpopulation problem! Just adopt, for goodness sake.

It's obviously a problem when people are having kids for status' sake too. That's just sinister. Family man=mature and responsible. That's the mindset of all too many idiots in this country, it has to stop.

All this said, that baby I saw this weekend blew my mind. He made me happy. I wanted to smile and celebrate with his parents. There was real joy. And I didn't even think about overpopulation when I held him. He is a person, and he is here with me. We're in it together, and we'll work together to make things better. Maybe he'll even vote for the worldwide vasectomy law with me someday.

1 comment:

Andrea said...

Having such a law in place would be totalitarian/fascist. no one has a right to stop us from doing what comes naturally to the human race. No one.

And yeah... babies are alive, even when they are still in the womb. You were alive when you were in your mothers womb. What is the point of existing as human beings if we are willing to wipe ourselves out as a species? It makes no sense. Sorry!

Babies are not the enemy. Try to remember that.